Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
