wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
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