this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
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