I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
