who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Banned from zoo.
Again?
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
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