How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
