wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
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