i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
