either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
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