yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
the day after is always just damage control
Even my vagina gasped.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Randomize
