so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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