return my video game
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Randomize
