Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
Randomize
