why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize