But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Randomize
