I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Randomize
