a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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