I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
