Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize
