Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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