yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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