I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Randomize
