Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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