So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Randomize
