He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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