oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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