Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
