seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize
