Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
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