I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
This house was built for laser tag.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
