Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Randomize
