Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
