after a month anything with tits is on the radar
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
