Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize
