i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
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