why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
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