I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
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