We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
