Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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