Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize
