haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
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