Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
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