I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
