puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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