i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
i wish my penis had a tongue
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
