I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
I have aggressive nipples.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize
