the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Randomize
