You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
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