It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
