Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
there was a trapeze. enough said
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Randomize
